The Ultimate, Ridiculous, No Holds Barred, In Depth, Outlandish, Chicago Bears Season Preview EVER!!!

If the over the top title didn’t tell you what you need to know, I don’t know what will! This is the ONLY Chicago Bears season preview you ABSOLUTELY have to read! Well that might be strong, and to be honest you’ll potentially hate every minute you spend reading this, and you’ll want to find where I live and box me square in the hatch basket. But, I’ve gotta sell advertising space somehow, right…? I mean, no one is truly excited for the Bears season, correct? NFL certainly, but Bears? Naw…

I guess I don’t know how to sell advertising space afterall…

Anyways, I’ve come here to do a job and I’m going to give the people what they think they want. And while I joke about fans potentially not wanting to know what to expect from the Chicago Bears this season, we have a certain sense of pride and commitment to the team, even if it may or may not be the best of years ahead.

Whether you like Jay Cutler or not, trust Alshon Jeffery, think Jeremy Langford could make a seamless transition from Matt Forte, we will cover it all for you, the Chicago Bears fan.

Roster

Quarterback

Yeah yeah yeah, you don’t like Jay Cutler. He’s probably thrown an interception in the time that I’ve wrote this sentence.

Tell you what… GET OVER IT!

Do you want to know some of the starting quarterbacks in the NFL? Blaine Gabbert, Trevor Siemian, Brock Osweiler, Jared Goff, Marcus Mariota, Ryan Fitzpatrick, Sam Bradford, Alex Smith, Kirk Cousins, Blake Bortles, Shaun Hill, Jameis Winston, Tyrod Taylor, Dak Prescott, and Derek Carr. But you have the balls to complain that the Bears trot out Jay Cutler every Sunday. The man that owns Bears records in passing yards (22,384), completions (1,939), touchdowns (150), QB Rating (85.5), 300 yard games (16), and wins (50).

Jay Cutler is not Aaron Rodgers, or Tom Brady, or Drew Brees – and that is ok because there are only like five of those guys in the the world.

“But you need an elite quarterback to win in the NFL….” blah, blah, blah! The Broncos won last season with a horrible Peyton Manning, Joe Flacco, Eli Manning (don’t you dare say he’s elite)… We’ve also seen Brad Johnson and Trent Dilfer win Super Bowls since 2000. An elite level quarterback certainly gives your team a better shot at competing year-after-year, but 33% of the quarterbacks that have won since 2000 have been less than elite level guys.

Cutler has shown that he can win and adjust and grow in Chicago. From taking this team to an NFC Championship Game, to toning down his gunslinging mentality, looking for the checkdowns, taking a sack or throwing the ball away – he has shown very good growth, albeit late in his NFL career.

When we look to the backups in Chicago… well… Brian Hoyer… ah… we’ve heard about him this preseason.

He has bounced around a bit, and has landed here in Chicago this season. The secret underbelly of the Bears fanbase has certainly been calling for the team to give him an opportunity, if only to see what the team has in him.

He had some, ah, ok success in both Cleveland and in Houston. Throwing for 31 TDs and 20 INTs while winning 12 of his 22 starts over the past two years, he certainly is a nice guy to have riding the pine behind Cutler. He is also a guy that learned under Tom Brady and Bill Belichick, so that can’t be bad.

Pro Football Focus doesn’t like the Bears QBs, and I doubt you’ll see much love for them around the league, but John Fox won’t ask much from this unit in 2016.

Ultimately the quarterbacks are enough for the Bears to be competitive in 2016. While they could be a huge reason for a failed 2016, they more than likely will not be a huge reason for the Bears success in 2016… if that make sense.

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Running backs

If you like professional analysis, Pro Football Focus has the Bears running backs ranked 28th best in the league, and it makes complete sense. The Bears went from a great back to a trio of guys with limited experience in the league. That cannot be good.

John Fox doesn’t believe in a true workhorse running back. It makes me wonder what Fox would do if he had a guy like Adrian Peterson (the good one in Minnesota and not the one the Bears used to have)? Would he split carries?

Either way, Matt Forte, probably the third best running back in Chicago Bears history, was run out of town in favor of a multi-headed running attack of Jeremy Langford, Ka’Deem Carey, and Jordan Howard. Now we’ve seen Carey the last couple of seasons, but he hasn’t really been anything to write home about. Howard has had some buzz, the fifth round draft pick beat out Jacquizz Rodgers to land the third string running back spot. His success at Indiana last year, and some excellent play in preseason has some thinking he could be a breakout player on the offense in 2016.

Ultimately, this is the year all eyes are on Langford. He was the guy that was drafted to replace Forte, he is the guy that had high marks and reviews coming to the Bears, and he is the guy that will now man the same backfield that Walter Payton, Gale Sayers, and Forte manned. He might not be tasked with racking up 1,500 rushing yards, or receiving 100 catches, but he will be the main man in the backfield in 2016.

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Wide Receivers

Looking at this core it should be the most talented and excitable unit on the offense, but possibly has the most question marks. Starting off with Alshon Jeffery, who is one of the best big bodied receivers in the world today, the Bears should be able to move the ball through the air when targeting him, if he stays on the field enough.

There are some very real questions with Bears second year player (but really a rookie) Kevin White. While a bum knee kept him out of the 2015 season, he will be expected to play like he’s an experienced player if the Bears are to compete in 2016. He will most likely have some issues with the speed of the game once the real season begins, but he is too talented to not be able to produce, and he will certainly be up to speed by the mid point in the season.

The there is Eddie Royal. Will he be able to suit up for more than 10 games in 2016? If so, quarterback Jay Cutler will have a nice check-down security blanket. If not, it could be a long season for the Bears passing game.

But the air game will go through Alshon, and if he feels like dressing every game, then actually feels like playing for the Bears, not letting contract talks or concerns effect his play, the receiving core should be a very good one. Pro Football Focus may disagree a bit with me (I’ll admit, they know what they’re talking about a little bit more than I do), but I expect some very good things from the Bears receivers in 2016.

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Tight Ends

With the Bears turning away Martellus Bennett in the offseason, they turned the reigns over to Zach Miller. Mostly thought of as a blocking TE, Miller made a couple of circus catches on pace to his most successful offensive production season in 2015. His 5 TDs was more than he had compiled over his first three seasons in the NFL, and his 439 receiving yards was about 50 yards short of his combined career totals.

Miller might not be a proven commodity yet, but his 2015 is certainly repeatable and one could expect that he improves upon a career season.

It is the rest of the corps that gives you cause for concern. And by rest of the corps I mean Greg Scruggs.

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Offensive line

How in the absolute world did the Green Bay Packers release three-time Pro Bowl guard, Josh Sitton? While there are still some questions on this Bears offensive line, the addition of Sitton, pairing him with the team’s other Pro Bowl guard, Kyle Long, QB Jay Cutler should have some time to find open receivers downfield for big gains.

That’s right, there are three other positions on the offensive line, and the leader of the line (center) is a GIGANTIC question mark. Yes Ted Larsen has started 57 games in his pro career, and has started in 16 games in each of his last three seasons in the NFL. The bulk of the time will belong to Cody Whitehair however, and that could be downright scary. I have heard time-and-time again from Bears insiders that there isn’t much to worry about Whitehair, but please remember he is basically the team’s third option.

I do have some concerns about Larsen and Whitehair, but but not as concerned as I am about the tackles on this roster. These two spots could end a team’s chances if there are not good, and nothing about Charles Leno and Bobbie Massey tell me to be assured that Cutler will have time in the pocket.

With the loss of Matt Slauson, loss of Hroniss Grasu, Jordan Mills, and Jermon Bushrod (some via offseason, some via injury) the Bears offensive line will need to grow up and bond fast if they plan on being a quality team in 2016. With Pro Football Focus ranking the Bears line as the 30th line in football, there aren’t many expectations for this unit. Luckily the Bears offense uses their guards to pull a lot in their scheme. Using their Pro Bowl guards to pull, rolling Cutler out and allowing the athletic line to move with him, could create additional time for the quarterback or holes for a running back. Or of course it could be a complete blood bath.

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<<<CONTINUE TO THE BEARS DEFENSE AND SPECIAL TEAMS REVIEW>>>

<<<CONTINUE TO THE BEARS SCHEDULE AND PREDICTIONS (PLEASE READ ABOVE FIRST)>>>

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